56 Thoughts A Girl Has When She Knows It's Nearly Bikini Season

Wednesday, June 03, 2015


The daunting feeling that is bikini season is upon us. Time to strip off to reveal your perfectly toned bod in some form of neon triangl bikini. Ha. Yep that means goodbye to fast food and hello fruit and veg, well that's the idea anyway.

Even though bikini season means all the thrills of late nights, sunshine and ice cream (bring me a bucket full), it brings sudden bursts of "Oh sh*t" and "what the f*ck am I going to do?!". 

So here are 56 thoughts a girl has when she knows it's nearly bikini season...

1. Sh*t

2. Nah I can't do this

3. F*ck

4. It's June

5. Maybe I should start going to the gym

6. Maybe I should've started going to the gym a long time ago

7. Everyone's going to look so hot this summer

8. I just can't compete

9. That's it

10. I'll sleep until winter

11. No, I can do this

12. All I've got to do is stop eating cr*p

13. Lol next joke please

14. Maybe I'll go for a run

15. Yeah I'll go for a run everyday

16. That should get rid of my muffin top

17. As if I am going to run

18. Maybe I'll do a juice cleanse

19. Apparently that works

20. Or maybe a detox

21. But chocolate though

22. I can't go out in a bikini like this

23. I need to sort my life out

24. C'mon I can do this

25. I can't do this

26. Why am I crying

27. Stop

28. Wait

29. Where did that stretch mark come from

30. Oh hello cellulite

31. I am the definition of a beach whale

32. Sh*t, I've really let myself go

33. I blame exams, y'know comfort eating and stuff

34. Yeah that's defo why I'm fat

35. Right that's it

36. No carbs

37. But what about pasta

38. I'll start Monday

39. Okay if I cram all the food in now I won't have any left so it will be easier, yeah?

40. Femalemotivation on Instagram just doesn't help

41. They all have abs of steal

42. And I have ab-solutely nothing

43. Should I do the 30 day ab challenge???

44. HAHAHAHAHA

45. How can I look good in a bikini with my rolls

46. What about a high waisted bikini???

47. What about a tankini????

48. What about a wetsuit????

49. How many days till summer starts?!?!?!

50. I should have started planning for my summer body last year

51. I'm one more "off to the gym" selfie on Instagram away from having a mental breakdown

52. Maybe I'll just be fat and make a point

53. Yeah it's all about inner beauty

54. Who am I kidding

55. Hmm I fancy some chocolate

56. Well there's always next summer


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